Friday, September 12, 2008

I think you're still single because...

When you're 32, single and seemingly a "catch," people *LOVE* to speculate about why you haven't found your knight in shining armor yet. And when they do, they usually try to pinpoint a singular reason.

Are you being too picky? I love when people automatically assume that a. I'm picky and b. that's the reason I'm single. Really, I'm not all that picky. I mean, I'm not going to date some cokehead who begs for money on Public Square, but I don't think that qualifies as being "picky." I am just looking for someone who is like me but with a... um... Y chromosome.

Maybe you're too intimidating to guys. I can not TELL you how many people say that the reason they think I'm single is that I'm intimidating. And every time they say that, I always ask what they mean by "intimidating" (because, let's face it, that word doesn't have the most positive connotation). Usually, the answer involves me being outgoing, professionally successful and pretty (their words, not mine... though I don't often argue b/c at least it makes me feel a teeny bit better about being solo). But last time I checked, I thought those were the attributes that guys were looking for. I guess that means unattractive, wallflower toilet cleaners are more desirable than me. But at least they're not intimidating.

Guys probably just assume you're already taken. I deal a little better with this suggestion because at least it takes the blame entirely off of me. I'm not saying I'm 100% perfect in the world of dating, but the picky and intimidating answers seem to suggest that my bachelorettehood is all my doing.

How come the answer can't just be that I just haven't found *the* guy yet?

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