From The Mouse to The Winner

I can now officially say that I dated the nation's Bachelor of the Year.

That's right, ladies. (And gents.)

The Mouse won Cosmo's Bachelor Hunt!

Check out the story here. And thanks to everyone who voted for him! :)

Meet The Mouse (and vote for him!)

Anyone who's been reading this blog for any length of time knows a few things:

• I've dated my share of frogs (though, admittedly, they weren't ALL frogs -- maybe just not right for me)
• Every guy I write about gets a nickname so as to protect the innocent (and the guilty)
• I've never "outed" a guy on the blog with his real identity (though The Greek did out himself after that whole saga went down)
• I really try to stay friendly with (most of) my ex-es because there's no point in not doing so
• Most of the guys I date are pretty metrosexual and often HOT
  

Which brings us to today's post. About Cleveland's hometown hottie, Ryan "Mickey" McLean, who's up for this year's Bachelor of the Year for Cosmo magazine. Cute, no?


Whether you realize it or not, many of you already know Mickey. How so? Well, he's been written about here before. Mickey is The Mouse.

(You can read all the posts I've written about him here. And don't worry; he pre-approved his "outing" for this post.)

Anyhow, Mick is a great guy (who just happens to be delish on the eyes) and I'd love to see him win this contest. So won't you help him? Just click on this link to cast your vote for Mr. Ohio. You can vote once per day until October 10.

C'mon ladies. Let's do this.

S.O.S.: Take 4... coming to a blog near you

First, let me define S.O.S. for you: Summer of Sin.

S.O.S. started several summers ago when I was single and finally ready to start dating. I had mentally moved on from The Murse and was ready to start rocking the dating scene again. About three weeks after I announced the kick off to S.O.S., I met The Divorcee and we immediately started dating.

S.O.S. (the inaugural) was a FAIL.

(Not that I meant S.O.S. to be a huge whorefest. I just wanted to date a lot of different people after being with the same person for longer than most Hollywood marriages last.)

Since that summer, I've dubbed every subsequent hot weather season Summer of Sin. And I just realized today when looking at my calendar that I'm quickly approaching Summer of Sin: Take 4.

(As background for you, S.O.S.: Take 1 was spent with The Divorcee. S.O.S.: Take 2 was spent with The Mouse. S.O.S.: Take 3 was spent with... well, a bunch of losers. And it was actually the reason I started this blog!!)

So, I've gotta tell ya. The idea behind S.O.S. was very fun in theory. But now that I've lived through "spoiled" S.O.S.s (where I ended up dating/hanging out with one person for the entire summer) and a "legit" S.O.S. (where I ended up being single and attempting to date), I really prefer the "spoiled" version of S.O.S. (Like, a lot more.)

There's just something about summer that makes it more fun to have a BF. Someone to know you're going to hang out with on the warm-weather weekends. Someone to grab a weeknite beer on a patio with. Someone to chow a hot dog (and a hot pretzel!) at the ballpark with. Someone to do anything fun with.

But... since summer is upon us and I have virtually no prospects on the dating horizon, I guess I'll say what I always say at this time of year: "Summer of Sin... let it begin!"

Who's with me?

Taking a boy break -- or am I?

I haven't written about a lot of the boys swirling about me these days. (The Teacher, The Teachalian, The Italian Stallion, The Mouse and The Banker all made appearances in some way during the holidays.) Because, to be honest, I needed a boy break.

The truth is... sometimes it is exhausting to be constantly thinking about my (lack of) love life. Sure, there are always randoms floating around (who'd have thunk that damn Banker would show up via random holiday texts -- THREE of them!), but I haven't really had a *real* date since The Lawyer. And we all know how that turned out.

So, I haven't been returning boys' calls.

I haven't been returning boys' emails.

I haven't been returning (some) boys' texts.

I just needed a break.

But, I think I am going to start '09 with a fresh perspective. Focus less on quantity and more on quality.

(Though, as Molly likes to remind me... it only takes one. So wouldn't my chances be better if I have more to choose from? Who knows.)

And here's fair warning: I may just need a couple more weeks of minimal boy interaction. Except, of course, for TMGB. Because he'll be back next week with his new weekly feature -- Man Mondays. (Which means I'll have to email with him in the meantime.)

(BTW, did you see his post this week? I effing loved it.)

Anyhow... what do you think? Should I continue with this self-imposed XY-ile (that's supposed to be a cutesy way to say "boy exile"), or should I surround myself with as many potentials as possible (figuring that at least someone might be worth dating?!?!)?

Guest blogger #4 - Fully Loaded

Hi, readers! Hope good old Saint Nick brought you everything you wanted for Christmas. (No, I didn't get a boyfriend. Though I did get a new camera. Even trade, no?)

Just to clean up a few loose ends...

• The Mouse did not end up coming over for Christmas. (He was able to make it home to be with his own family.)


• And The Beard has been texting a TON. But alas, he's leaving to go back home tomorrow. However, that did not stop my sissy from re-enacting our PDA session to the entire family on Christmas Eve. Which was actually sort of helpful, since I don't really remember it.


• I got a random "Merry Christmas" (spelled wrong -- who spells it "Marry"??) mass text from The Banker. WTF? I haven't talked to him since October.


• And The Teacher and I have talked on the phone a few times and may be meeting up at some point this Sunday.

So I should have plenty to update you on in the next couple of weeks!

Now on to more important things... like guest blog posts. This submission comes us courtesy of the blog Famously Single.

There's one more guest blogger in the hopper, but he (yes, you read that right -- HE) is going to wait a couple of weeks to send his submission. (Timing is everything, peeps, right?)

(As a side note... I was thinking the other day of how random it would be if The Male Guest Blogger (TMGB) and I somehow end up together. That would be such a fun story for our kids someday... and, hopefully, the movie studios.)

Til then, enjoy this little nugget from Ms. Famously Single.

*****

After having my heart broken and five months of no sex, I decided it was really time to get into the game. Enter Mac.

We met while out for a mutual friend's birthday party. He was cute, in the military and I was slightly needy. He seemed like such a nice guy and maybe after five months, I wasn't being as selective. In my drunk state, I even text messaged my dad saying I met the man I wanted to marry.

Fast forward a few weeks. I wake up next to him. This is like the second time we have ever slept together. He is getting up to go golfing. I am lying in his bed. He's about to leave. He says, "Just so you know, that gun right there is fully loaded. So if you try to mess around with it, it's loaded and it will go off."

I say, "Wait... I slept with a loaded gun by me the whole night?" (Always a Bridesmaid sidenote: That's What She Said.)

He says, "Yeah. Alright, I'm leaving."

He is almost to the door. I'm already thinking he is a psycho, until... wait for it.... he turns around and says, "Your p*ssy's mine." (Always a Bridesmaid sidenote: I HATE that p word... but doesn't every girl?)

I've slept with this man twice and already he is staking claim on my p*ssy! Seriously, who says that? For once in my life, I was literally speechless. What are you supposed to say to that?

I wish I would have said your d*ck is mine, but I found out that it wasn't. Maybe that line really worked for him because while he was screwing everything with two legs, the girls were not.

On a side note, I found out that he shot some guy in the leg who tried to get into his girl's apartment. Guess there is one benefit to sleeping by a loaded gun. :)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house...

... not a creature was stirring, not even The Mouse.

(Too much of a stretch? Yeah, you're probably right.)

But I thought you would enjoy the fact that blogdad invited The Mouse over for Christmas in case the weather is too bad for him to make it back to his hometown for the holidays. (Remember? In addition to being a past boy toy, The Mouse is also a close family friend.)

I wonder if this isn't blogdad's attempt to play St. Nicholas. (Blogdad was a professional mall Santa back in the day, after all.)

Hmmm. Wonder if that means I'm on the naughty or nice list? ;)

Merry Christmas, everyone!

(A few more guest blogger posts are in the hopper for after the holidays!)

The boomerang club

I've discovered a very interesting phenomenon in my life: boomerang boys.

While no one has ever been quite as bad as The Groundhog, there seems to be a trend of guys disappearing then reappearing at the weirdest/most random times.

I've had a few recent boomerang encounters:

• The Paramedic - I went on one date with this kid a year or two ago. He was SUPER young. As in, younger than my youngest sissy young. On the day of our date, he found out that he had just landed the new job he'd been going after, so he wanted to go "somewhere nice" (his words) to celebrate. We went to the Outback. Fast forward to a few days ago when he Facebook friended me (with a profile pic featuring his new GF), then sent me a message telling me that I still have "that million dollar smile and hair." I've heard of a million dollar smile, but million dollar hair? That must be SOME weave.


• The Mouse - This is the guy I "hung out with" (again, his words) last year. Totally same sense of humor as me (though he is much less animated and much more sarcastic). And un-be-liev-ab-ly cute. I mean, he has dimples. *melt* Anyhow, hadn't really talked to him much over the last several months, but he called a couple of weeks ago and has been emailing and texting (even sending jokey e-cards!) ever since. But, as I said in previous posts, I'm fairly certain this is on the "friend track."


• The Cop - I thought he had gotten the hint that the only time I'd ever see the back of his cop car was if I got arrested (and not for a makeout session), but I guess not. He's been FB messaging me to come meet him out at a bar, come to events he'll be at, etc. Weird.


• The Redhead - According to blogmom, this kid was my first-ever boyfriend. We went to grade school together until my family moved in third grade. I had not talked to him since then (what is that? 24 years?) until he Facebook friended me last week. While catching up via FB, I discovered yet another six degrees connection: he was fraternity brothers with The Murse back in college. (Seriously, people. That is just crazy. I've decided my life is more like two degrees of separation.)

And on top of these oldies (and questionable goodies), I've also heard from The Teacher, The Teachalian and The Italian Stallion in the past week.

Let's hope they don't all turn into boomerangers too.

Random weekend contacts

Had a lot of random run-ins/contact with some current and former XY interests over the weekend.

• The Pocket-sized Chef - saw him at a happy hour event I was at with my sister and brother-in-law. He again pretended like we sort of knew each other, but he wasn't sure from where. I almost reminded him that it was from his incessant phone stalking of me after we first met, but I refrained. I also discovered that I think I may be the same height as him (and I am 5'2").


• The Mouse - got several random text messages from him on Friday nite after the Pocket-sized Chef happy hour run-in. He was out in my neighborhood and wanted to see if I was out (I was home and in my PJs already), then wanted me to give suggestions for places he should go. Our text exchange reminded me that I need to make plans to catch up with him sometime soon b/c we are equals in the smartass department, which I enjoy. (And for those of you who are freaking out reading that, I mean to catch up AS FRIENDS.)


• The Chef - as I mentioned in this post, ran into him at 806 in Tremont.


• The Lawyer - missed a call from him on Sunday evening when I was charging my cell phone (aka Goldie) in the other room. I really do like his voice on messages (this was the first time he left a message... all other times he didn't, which I called him out on during our date). I'll call him back on Monday (it was around 9:45 when I saw the message, and I thought that was too late to return the call).


• The New York Politico (nka The DC Grad Student) - haven't heard from him since the '60s. Then I got a random Facebook post that just said, "Hi cutie." And for some reason, that made me smile more than any of the other boy run-ins this weekend. Weird.

Should be interesting to see what the rest of this month has in store based on the random collection of messages/run-ins in this three-day span. Maybe this is the result of the vibe I was feeling on Saturday! (See this post.)

P.S. Prepare yourselves now, readers. I'm heading to Florida on Thursday for a few days with my GF Molly before she gets married next month (guess you could call it a "friendmoon") and I probably won't be blogging much (if at all). Here's hoping I have some weird run-in with an 80-year-old retiree to keep us ALL entertained next week. :)

World's longest happy hour

Last time I checked, you weren't supposed to get home from "happy hour" at 3am. But I did. Oops.

Lucky for you, that long nite led to many interesting boy stories:

1. The Mouse - ran into him at the happy hour I went to with my sister. He is friends with my brother-in-law, and we actually casually dated for several months (though I never called him my BF). He is funny and VERY cute (as in, blogmom has a not-so-secret crush on him), but I think we're better off as just friends. Which is good, since I see him ALL the time now b/c he's sort of like my bro-in-law's little brother. (There is another part of this story involving a pocket-sized chef who resembles Chris Kattan, but I'll save that for another post.)


2. The Cop - while at the first happy hour, I ran into my friend Amy from work. We decided to meet my cousin Katy at another bar, where Katy proceeded to tell me about a guy she thinks would help her win the finders' fee challenge. She sent him my number while we were there, and we texted a bit last nite. He wants to try to meet up on Sunday to watch the Browns game.


3. The Banker - Katy and her friends decided to hit up another bar down the street, so Amy and I left for a bar closer to our neck of the woods. Went to a cute little place in Westlake (where we accidentally ended up crashing the Bay H.S. class of '73 reunion. Ooops). So, we headed further into the bar, where I met The Banker. Super cute, seemed to have a good job, but was actually pretty drunk so I really don't have a good feel for what he'd be like sober. But, he did text last nite to make sure I got home OK and sent a little note this morning to tell me he had fun last nite. Hmmm...
   

On tap for tonite: going out for my friend Carrie's bday in the W. 25th area. The Banker said he might be around there tonite too. Interesting...

*** UPDATE *** I posted this at noonish on Saturday, so I'm not sure why it's showing Friday. Weird.