Friday, March 13, 2009

I've heard of a 3-day wait period, but this is just crazy

We all have heard "the rule" for how long a guy waits to call (or these days, text) a girl after an initial conversation or first date. What, two or three days, right?

Wrong. Apparently, it's almost one month. After having brunch the day after Valentine's Day with Val (after meeting the nite before and him being adamant about getting together sooner than later), he pretty much disappeared (even though we had talked about possibly getting together the following weekend to grab a drink at The Velvet Tango Room).

Since that is par for the course in my dating life, I didn't think anything of it. And the more I "virtually" got to know him through his Facebook status updates (he had "friended" me while we were on our brunch date), the more I was questioning just what kind of guy Val is.

(What grown-ass man uses the word "dookies" in his status updates? Seriously?)

Then, on Wednesday nite, I receive this text from Val at almost 10:30pm:

R u doing happy hour tomorrow

My initial reactions to the text:

  • You are very random, Val

  • He must have sent this text to the wrong person

  • Did we have plans that I don't remember making?

  • Why didn't he use a question mark?

After that short-lived inner monologue, I texted back that I already had dinner plans with some friends, but assumed he must be going to happy hour so to have fun.

He replied with this: I was gonna meet up with u a chop house.

Again, I do not recall having plans to go to the Chop House with you, Val (though I do love their happy hour). I mean, if that is a request for a date, couldn't he at least have said, "I was hoping we could meet up at Chop House for a drink." Or something sort of like that?!?

Regardless, I had other plans last nite (a very fun girl date at Three Birds, where I ate too much bread and drank too much wine), so I didn't end up meeting up with him.

Guess that means I should expect to hear from him again in about another month or so. (Man, I am getting flashbacks of The Groundhog!)


d said...

That text is a sorry excuse for a first move after a month hiatus, in my personal opinion. I hate men.

slopmaster said...

but it got you thinking... he's a slick cat that guy. Defintely worth a try, he'll give you a fun time.

Always a Bridesmaid said...

d - I agree on the lameness of the text. Jury's still out on whether I hate men. ;)

Slopmaster - hmmm... you think the randomness was planned? I just thought he was being lazy.

Medicated and Motivated said...

No, the randomness was not planned. Val is either lazy or he's a douche. Probably both. And what the hell is wrong with men? Not only is it not acceptable for him to text after a month of no contact, it is not acceptable the way he was trying to ask for a date. He should have called you, apologized for taking so long to call you, then begged for your forgiveness and to please give him another chance to go out with you. You should have waited a month before replying to his text.

Anonymous said...

He waited a month? That's kinda weird. And the next time he texts you he doesn't even use a question mark. I would have totally thought he sent it to the wrong person.

Men are so lame sometimes. :)

Anonymous said...

Since being in the "dating scene" I have realized if a guy really wants to hang out with you, he will go the extra mile to treat you well and give you notice!

So I would tell this guy adios and if he really is interested, he should step up to the plate, contact you more than once a month, and ask you out a few days PRIOR to the date!

Remember, you deserve a guy who is willing to spoil you... from the beginning :)

Always a Bridesmaid said...

Medicated - damnit. I love the month-long wait period before texting back. Crap.

Diana - my sentiments exactly.

Smash - thank you, my dear!