During the revelry that was the all-girls bachelor party for our friend Brian a couple of weekends ago, I gave my number to a guy who was hanging out near us at the Velvet Dog.
What a mistake.
(And I wasn't even drunk.)
(OK, I wasn't even that drunk.)
Anyhow, he called three times the day after we met (but did not leave a message), then sent me a text the following day:
Ummm... that is just all kinds of wrong. (Especially b/c anyone who knows me in real life calls me the Grammar Queen. Even though I take a lot of grammatical liberties when it comes to my blog. Like that past non-sentence, for example.)
Anyhow, I immediately knew I was not interested. But I didn't want to be a complete bitch, so I politely wrote back (with correct grammar) and told him that I had a long day at work and was heading to a meeting for the rest of the nite.
Below is the series of follow-up texts that I received from him (none of which I responded to):
- Jus takin it easy. Call me when your done I want to talk to u. What type if (sic) work u do (sent late last Monday)
- Goodmorning AAB. Hope u have a wonderful day today. When u get a minute give me a call or text. ***Grammar Guy*** (sent last Tuesday morning before 7am -- and, yes, he did sign his name with three stars on either side of it)
- Hi AAB. Give me a call when u get this message. (sent later that same day around 5pm)
He then proceeded to call me TWICE that nite. The last time he called, he left a message and said he wasn't going to call again if I didn't call him back.(And, P.S., he talks just like he texts.)
I didn't call or text back. So I thought the saga was over. Until I got this doozy on Thursday:
Hi, Always a Bridesmaid. Jus wanted to know if I could meet u somewhere or take u out this weekend.
Now don't get me wrong. I realize that not everyone was an English major in college... but I also can not ever imagine dating someone who talks and/or texts like 50 Cent. I mean, the word "just" has a "t" on the end of it, FYI.Man, I obviously needed Jorge as a wingman the nite I met the Grammar Guy... to "jus" keep me AWAY from him!
***Always a Bridesmaid***