Tuesday, February 10, 2009

The one you can't forget

Why is it that no matter how hard you try to forget that one ex- that made an indelible mark on you, he always finds a way to work his way into your subconscious... even when he might not be trying?

That's how I am with The Divorcee. No matter how much I try to forget about him, random things always seem to happen that bring him right back.

Three things happened since late last week:

  • Blogdad called to tell me that The Divorcee is single again. How does he know, you ask? Well, because one of blogdad's colleagues happened to be recently dating The Divorcee. (Six degrees, I tell you!!!! Now you HAVE to believe me!) My parents discovered this when they ran into this girl and The Divorcee at The Feast in Little Italy over the summer. Anyhow, blogdad called to tell me this little tidbit because he thought my birthday horoscope said something about someone from my past coming back. (In fact, it said that someone important to my life's history will be entering my life in the near future. Which I suppose could be one in the same. God, I hope that doesn't mean some gross guy might come back though.) But that's all just a long way of saying... reminder number one.

  • While I was at the nail salon on Saturday, I got a picture text from one of my friends at work that said, "Is this ur ex?" And, indeed, it was. She snapped his pic from afar at Starbucks. (She's actually never met him, but saw a pic once after I was forced to defend the caliber of guys I date because another girl in our office had made a snide comment about my BFs -- whom she had never seen, BTW. Anyhow, seriously... I have dated some cute guys. The Divorcee is a cross between McSteamy and Leonardo DiCaprio. Yum.) Anyhow, I digress. Reminder number two. (And a really random one at that, no?)

  • On Sunday, I discovered that The Divorcee has just joined Facebook. How do I know? Two of his friends had previously FB friended me after the break-up (emphasis that THEY friended ME, which I was totally cool with because I actually really liked them and hoped we could somehow stay in touch after the break-up). Anyhow, one of the said friends commented on one of The Divorcees' pics on Sunday. That comment/pic showed up in my news feed. Reminder three.

UGH. I can't shake this guy. And I really can't explain it. I know I should hate him for breaking my heart, but I just can't. Eff. What's also really weird is the timing of all of this. We broke up (for good, after a couple of starts and stops due to his unresolved feelings about his divorce) the week before Valentine's Day a couple of years ago. This same exact week two years ago. (Guess that makes reminder number four, huh?)

Does anyone else have that one guy they can't seem to shake? Or did you, but you got over it? If so, HELP!?!?!?!?


Unknown said...

maybe its just meant to be.

probably not though, It seems like you should reach out to him.. hey, if your dad and your horoscope say so!

Ashley said...

Wish I could help - every time I think my ex (of 5 years) is out of my life for good he creeps back in somehow. I'll be checking back for other readers' advice on this one.

Anonymous said...

Yup, I got one of those. I call him the Keep Around. Even though he seriously broke my heart as well a couple years ago.

I haven't seen him in a while, yet we still keep in touch via social media and this text-ual relationship thing.

And he's coming to Cleveland this weekend to hang out... on Valentine's Day. Yup. On that same notion, I'll be holding my breath until he actually arrives and knocks on my door. LOL

Anonymous said...

My experience has been an ex I can't forget is a great reminder of the reason why things didn't work out so I won't make the same mistake again. Maybe my situation is a little different, but I've tried to use it to my advantage rather than dwell on the past.

Always a Bridesmaid said...

Angel - hmmm. Interesting thought.

Ashley - glad I'm not alone!

Mel - ditto to what I said to Ash. And you're spending Val together?!?!?!

Sea Level - you're right. I usually do learn from past relationships. But this one just sticks in my gut for some reason.

Anonymous said...

A Fav Show of mine was and still is Felicity. I have an ex that I cannot get over....we broke up two years ago. When I heard this quote from the show, I thought...yep, sounds about right.

"Maybe getting over someone you’re in love with isn’t impossible. Unless, maybe you don’t actually get over it. Maybe you just learn to live with it."

Anonymous said...

I think sometimes it helps to look at all the things you wouldn't/couldn't have done if you were with them, that you did cause you weren't. People you met...parties you went to...etc. It just helps me to feel like I wouldn't be who I am without this little hiccup in relationship land. It's the whole Rascal Flatts "God Bless the Broken Road" theory of life. :)

Anonymous said...

Oh, I think you know the ex I cannot shake from my brain - The Mex Ex. Try moving 2500 miles away. That helps... but somehow he still haunts me!

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Allison M. said...

i would suggest buying yourself a new purse.

Always a Bridesmaid said...

Colleen -- learn to live with it? UGH. That sounds hard.

GG -- well, I don't listen to country music but I do like the idea of thinking about everything I've done since the break-up. Like start this blog. ;)

Stacy - The Mex Ex is TOTES your version of my Divorcee.

Kendy - WTF? Random.

Allison - best advice yet. Or possibly ever. You're right. I should replace him with Louis, Marc or Michael.