Thursday, April 29, 2010

How to hook 'em in a new city

This post comes to us courtesy of The Longhorn, who recently packed up and moved from Cleveland to the big bad state of Texas. Here, he examines what it's like dating in a new city. (As it turns out, sounds like it's pretty much the same everywhere!)


So I recently packed up and moved south. Why? Well, there’s obviously the weather. It’s almost always warm here, which leads to a tan and better moods. Also, there is the work angle. Without going into a lot of detail, I was given an amazing opportunity to work with some industry leaders in their space that would’ve been impossible to pass up.

Of course, life’s not all roses. A cross-country move presents a lot of challenges. A bunch of new colleagues, new surroundings, new apartment, new bars, new restaurants and new grocery stores can lead to a lot of confusion and uncertainty. This is all before trying to understand a new dating scene! (AAB sidenote: I think it's hilarious that a boy is worried about figuring out new grocery stores. Sounds like we have a little cook on our hands, ladies!)

CAVEAT: It’s not as if I really understood my old dating “grounds,” so layering on a totally different city can lead to some “holy crap” moments. So with that in mind, AAB thought it would be cool if I gave some similarities and differences between the two dating scenes.

What’s different?

  • College town environment – If you currently live, or have lived in a college town environment (outside of your actual college years, of course) you’ll know that the bar/club scene is a mixture of people our age (30-35) and those MUCH younger (21-24). While it is fun to entertain the possibility of dating someone younger, the reality is that I have VERY little in common with someone that age.
  • Push to settle down – My mom would obviously be interested in me settling down with someone sooner rather than later, but I’m not there yet. However, most of the women here definitely ARE! Most of their mothers are stay-at-home, and that tends to be their goal as well. I’m all for supporting the posse when the time is right, but let’s slow down the “white picket fence and 2.5 kids” theme for a bit.
  • More outdoor activities – Obviously, coming from Cleveland there’s a very small window for outdoor activities. Here, the window is WIDE OPEN! So with that comes the push to do more things outside. Sure, I like the outdoors. However, I’m not Ranger Rick if you know what I’m saying. I really have no interest in sitting at a picnic table, or on a rock, and staring at water for hours. Maybe that hurts me? Dunno.
What’s the same?

  • The Chase – I’m not a huge fan of the chase. Most of my dates are setups. I feel like I’ve got a better chance at success when a friend sets me because I think (perhaps foolishly) that they know my tastes well. However, there is still plenty of chasing here, which leads to a lot of wasted time/effort on my part (and hers). I’m not interested in jumping through hoops to date you. If we meet and it clicks then let’s go. Don’t make me chase you down to make it happen.
  • The “WTF” Moment – Guys will be able to relate more to this, but there are plenty of moments where you walk into a bar, see a couple together and wonder how the hell they ended up together. The guy has a million tattoos (not that tats are objectionable), no job, but is with the hottest woman in the place. Or, you meet him and he couldn’t be more of a dolt and you wonder how he could carry a conversation. Yeah, plenty of that going around here as well.
  • Good looking women – No real explanation needed here… both towns have an abundance of attractive ladies. They aren’t hard to find. Matching personalities-wise is a different story, obviously.
Those are just my observations. If you’ve moved from one city to another, what are some similarities and differences that you’ve seen?


MG said...

the looking to settle down and stay home (and not lying about it) reminds me of my year in Nashville

Anonymous said...

I lived in Seattle before I moved to Missouri. Talk about way different dating scenes. Guys actually pick up the heck here, where as I can't tell you how many checks I split or paid for altogether when I lived in Seattle. Here they actually use the manners their mommas taught them. Other than that, I can't say that too much is different. Except I date a whole lot few guys with tattoos and piercings than I did in Seattle!!

Anonymous said...

Rebekah -

The guy is expected to pick up the check here. 100% of the time. Not even a question. I do it as a force of habit, but it's common practice.

-The Longhorn

Anonymous said...

No matter where you are dating can be a trainwreck! Ugh!

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

i bet i know who the longhorn is!!!

Christina K said...

I love the name Ranger Rick! AAB, find someone to guest post who can use that name.

Anonymous said...

Alexa - You do? ;-)

Christina - glad I could spark some fun

-The Longhorn