Tuesday, October 26, 2010


When did Halloween become Whoreoween? I swear, Halloween is now just an excuse for girls to dress (and act) slutty. (Not that the single guys probably mind all that much.)

Me? Not so much. My rules for Halloween are simple:
  • I can't be uncomfortable. (One year, The Murse and I went to a party as the Unibomber and The Bomb. I was The Bomb, natch. Which meant I wore a giant cardboard box around all nite and couldn't lift my arms to drink my beer. And I needed help every time I went to the bathroom. Sidenote: my bladder is the size of a ping pong ball. That's when this rule was enacted.)
  • I can't look like a whore. (Unless, of course, I'm dressed as a whore. But then how would I look any different from my everyday wardrobe? Jaaaaaaay kaaaaaay.)
  • I can't look like an asshole. (Same ex-boyfriend, different costume: one year, The Murse and I went as the couple who had the Halloween party we went to every year. Except he was the wife and I was the husband. I wore Carhartt from head to toe and a drawn-on goatee. I looked like a reject from Extreme Makeover: Lesbian Home Edition and immediately swore -- after seeing pictures -- that I would never go out for Halloween again looking like an asshole.)
Since then, I haven't really had many opportunities to do a couple's costume with a significant other because, well... I haven't really been dating someone at Halloween. And it looks like this year won't be much different, as the boy toy will be working when I will be partying. Sad face.

(However, I am pretty juiced about my costume idea. And, no. I'm not divulging.)

Do you have a favorite couples' costume that you've worn (or seen) over the years? (One of my personal faves is when my sis and her now-hubs went as Cameltoe: he was the camel, she was the toe.)

And what's your take on this whole Whoreoween phenomenon?


Suburban Sweetheart said...

I think that women who dress hookerish on Halloween display a distinct lack of A) creativity and B) class. BE SOMETHING COOL. Show us how funny you are, how inventive you are, how awesome you are at turning everyday shit into fun stuff. But hike up your skirt & throw on some heels & call yourself a "slutty ____"? Negative awesomeness points.

On that note, I have been: a Boy Scout, Quailman, a giant pink crayon, the Keebler Elf, "fishing for compliments," "self-absorbed," "two ships passing in the night," &, yes, a pirate, which was as skanky as I ever got, but I thrifted for outfits for 15 people & made us ALL look awesome, so I think I get a pass on wearing a bodysuit & a skirt. With combat boots.

hermosamusica said...

no favorite couple costume. but i will brag about my most proud home-made costume here...a bullshit artist! I had a smock and a paint pallet and paint brushes. and i smeared brown paint all over everything and even glued fake poop to my smock and the pallet. oh, i was so pitifully proud of myself for thinking that one up. ok, i'm still totally pathetically proud of it!

A said...

Wow, what a disgusting blog entry. Slut shaming is not a good look for anyone. Way to promote patriarchy.

Georgia Rose said...

It's extremely disheartening to hear such blatant slut-shaming in a public forum.

Anonymous said...

slut shaming is so tacky. this is disgustingly misogynistic.

Lincoln said...

OK... I have to say that I'm a little out of touch with the haloween thing having not had a reason to dress up in....15 years? OMG. Anyway.

I have to take umbrage to your "not that the single guys probably mind that much"... call me a prude but I've never been one for excessive skin, and nothing kills interest faster than someone who dresses/acts slutty.

Have some self-respect and leave -something- to the imagination, please.

Always a Bridesmaid said...

Suburban -- I love all of your costume ideas!

hermosamusica -- bullshit artist is BRILLZ!!!

A -- slut shaming?

Georgia Rose -- slut shaming?

Anon -- slut shaming? I'm beginning to see a pattern in these comments, and would assume they all came from one person. I suppose you have your opinion, and I have mine. :)

Lincoln -- sorry, didn't mean to offend all the single guys (allll the single guys... sung to the tune of Beyonce). :)

Allison M. said...

great minds think alike.

i seriously want to be alice in wonderland and take my cat, captain jack, around with me. Problem is he weighs 18 pounds and lives with my parents in retirement.

Anonymous said...

Um, no -- these slut shaming comments are not coming from the same person.

Do you not know what slut shaming is? Here, let me educate you a little bit: http://finallyfeminism101.wordpress.com/2010/04/04/what-is-slut-shaming/

I want to know -- how are these women who dress like "whores" on Halloween hurting you in any way? You really have no business to judge anyone based on the way they dress -- as I assume you wouldn't want to be judged by the way you dress.

You have a right to your opinion, sure. Just be aware that your opinion is perpetuating the belief that women do not have the right to be sexual beings, and that it is an offensive opinion to many people.

seanski said...

Wow. This post has created quite the stir. That said, I will be a whore this Halloween. Whaaaaat whaaaaaaaat!!!!

Pamela McGowan said...

haha! I totally agree! The bf and and I are little red riding hood and the big bad wolf. I found a respectable costume (I think) but it took some searching to find a non hoe version of red riding hood.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Seanski. Wow! I wasn't at all offended by this post (and actually agree wiht it), but obviously some of your other readers are a bit sensitive about the topic. Geez.

Sissy2 said...

i just puked in my mouth reading about people caring about SLUT SHAMING. get a life and go on your whore-y way.

Anonymous said...

Ummmmmmm...you don't have to have a boyfriend to be part of a "couples" costume.

Mary Kate :)

Deviled Megs said...

Last year I dressed as Miley Cyrus and my roommate was Hannah Montana...we had a lot of fun putting the outfits together even though we often had to explain to people what we were :)

Jane Doe said...

Holy drama, Batman! I totally agree with you, SSB. I love the word "Whoreoween" -- that's totally what it's become.

As to when it started, I actually read something on Slate today. Check it out here.

Lindsey said...

Oh my god...some friends and I were talking about this the other day. Halloween is meant to come up with fun and interesting costumes...not just find the one with the least material!

Sarah said...

Hmm...last year I suppose I could have been dubbed a "slut" since I went as Octo-mom and the BF was the "sperm donor". Haha And this year (since he looks a little like Bret Favre...) he went as Brett Favre and I as Jenn Sterger (again, maybe I had some cleavage...but it was all about looking the part). Otherwise, we're usually something unrelated...and warm...and NOT slutty since we generally party in a tent on Halloween.

rachaelgking said...

I AM SO STEALING THIS WORD and I am madly in love with you for coming up with it. I spent Halloween on my couch, in my pjs, with a bottle of wine, watching Walking Dead... and it was just grand, if you ask me.

Anonymous said...

slutty halloween costumes are annoying unless those wearing them play the part to the T, and most don't have the balls, literally and metaphorically.

I think if i were socially allowed to smack a bitch if she pisses me off the same as I'd do for men with the same consequences then a slutty costume is just fine.

Let's just all remember that equality is an indiscriminate punch in the face when warranted.

Girl in Carolina said...

" just puked in my mouth reading about people caring about SLUT SHAMING" HAHAHA And agree. Whoreoween is nauseating.