Thursday, October 14, 2010


I've been FourStalked. And have lived to tell the story.

Picture it: I'm out cocktailing with a gal pal earlier this week. I checked in to the restaurant we were at on FourSquare. Then we continued dishing about the boys in our lives, and I didn't think twice about it.

But then, he came through the door. My FourStalker.

(As it turns out, he was a guy with whom I'd chatted on Twitter, and he seems very harmless and nice. And older gent who's a little lonely, maybe. But harmless.)

Anyhow, he saw that I had checked in to a place across the street from where he was, so he came over to meet me in person.

Now, he knew who I was, but I had no idea who he was because he doesn't use his picture on his twitter or FourSquare profiles. But because he knew what I looked like, he sidled up right next to me (my back was to him), asked the bartender what I was drinking and bought me a glass of wine. And nothing for himself. (Or my friend!)

I thought it was really weird that he was buying me a drink and not himself. But then I heard, "Excuse me. AAB? I'm FourStalker. I just wanted to come meet you in person and say hello because I saw you were here and I was across the street."

(Now before you get all Dateline: The FourSquare Killer on me, I must reiterate that this guy was completely harmless. We'd chatted on twitter on a number of occasions. But, again, because he doesn't use a picture there, I had no idea who he was when he initially approached.)

So... on to the best part of the story. It'd be one thing if this older gent came in dressed and looking like George Clooney. (Or Matt Lauer.) I could get into that. But noooooooo. This guy was most definitely NOT cut from that same cloth. (Literally.) And I believe what he looked like is probably best described in pictures.


A man who looked EERILY like Richard Dreyfuss:

Wearing a shirt that was half hunting gear, half Tommy Bahama (Note: I couldn't find a shirt that even slightly resembled the one he was actually wearing to share with you... which is probably a good thing, since now your eyes won't be bleeding for the rest of the day):
And who happened to be sporting one of THESE (except it was thinner and longer... *that's what she said*):

Wow. I've never been hit on by a guy with a rat tail before.

(And, God, I hope I never am again.)

Happy weekend, loves!


Lizzie said...

And THIS is why I'm not on FourSquare. :)

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh!! That's hilarious, I would have DIED!! And I unfortunately was imagining what that shirt looked like...ewwwwww!

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

OMG. who? tell me, ASAP.

BelleinBows said...

I just busted out laughing. Thank goodness he was harmless, too bad he looked like that. Rat tails simply baffle me.

Sisville2 said...

exactly why i think foursquare is scary! i've told you this before, sis! just friend people on foursquare who you actually know WELL (that's what i do). Sorry... just looking out for my sis! ;)

Allison M. said...

holy shit. i need to know who this is.

Beautifully Invisible said...

That is crazy. And exactly why I never signed up for Four Square either, harmless or not! LOL