No Jorts June (working title)

Crap. I just realized it's already June. Which means two things: 1. Mr. May-be was a bust (as were April Adventures and Manhunt March) and 2. I need a name for June's dating adventures.

And, so as not to get your hopes up, you should also probably know that my lunch soiree with The Ram got pushed back to next week. (Work stuff for both of us.) Pooh.

Crap and pooh. *Awesome* use of the English language, Always a Bridesmaid.

Since I can't seem to find the right words right now... wanna help me name this month's dating adventures? All I can think of is "No Jorts June" (as in, I won't go out with any man who wears jean shorts), but I've got to believe there are better options than that. Ideas?

(Sidenote: for some reason, I'm now singing that Nair commercial jingle that you probably all know, but in my warped little mind I've changed the words to "Who wears short jorts?" instead... God, what is wrong with me?)

"I'd love to meet a nice Italian girl, but..."

Seeing my friends Markiella yesterday reminded me of a funny story that I don't think I shared with you guys yet.

It all goes back several weeks, when I was at a party with Markiella and their families. I chatted with the mom of the XX half of Markiella for a good portion of the party, and she just couldn't understand how I am still single.

(I have a way of winning over the over 50 crowd. And eliciting the "how are you still single" question.)

Fast forward a couple of weeks, when I received a tweet (via Twitter, for those of you who may be as technologically backwards as me) from the XY half of Markiella, telling me that his mother-in-law (from the party) had a potential guy for me.

(I don't think the XY half had told his m-i-l about the finders' fee, so I assume he was acting as the go-between to maybe get his little hands on it.)

Apparently, his mother-in-law has a lot of interaction with professional guys all day as a result of her job (get your heads out of the gutter, you pigs), and she had one in particular who she had her eye on for me.

After I gave the go-ahead to attempt a fix up (hey, April Adventures, people!), his mother-in-law asked the potential suitor if he'd like to meet a nice Italian girl.

The potential suitor responded that he'd love to. Except that he's gay.

Soooo... I guess I should have been a teensy bit more specific about my prereqs for a guy. Funny. Family-oriented. Wears a watch (or in some other way showcases his responsibility). Has a job that he likes. Aaaaand... likes girls.

(I know, I know. You're remembering how I just recently professed the gay guy as my "type." But I'm fairly certain it would not work out in the real world of dating.)

On the bright side, I do know that Markiella's mom/mother-in-law definitely has the right kind of guy in mind for me. Now she just needs to make sure he likes girls too.

A new month, an old flame

Thanks to everyone who suggested names for this month's dating escapades. I loved them all and couldn't pick a fave, so I'm going to go with the whole "blood is thicker than blog-ter" mantra and pick blogmom's: April Adventures. (BTW, you won't see that suggestion as a comment on my last post. She texted it to me because she's afraid to comment on the blog too much. Oh, blogmom. How cute.)

And, as part of April Adventures, I'm going to try something new. There is a particular boy who I have a crush on right now (let's just say my stomach dropped when I met him). And I'm wondering if maybe the bad luck in my dating life is coming from blogging about the boys I go out with. (Wouldn't it be a pisser if the saboteur was right? That I'm inadvertently screwing up my dating life?)

So, I'm not going to blog about him. At least, not until I see where this is going.

In the meantime, I'm sure there will be plenty of other AAB escapades to share. For example... there was an ex-sighting this morning. Here's what happened.

I met a couple of my friends for brunch at Sweet Melissa's in Rocky River. When I got there, I scored an awesome spot on the street, and as I got out I noticed that the car behind me looked very similar to The Divorcee's. However, there are a zillion cars like that on the road, so I didn't really think anything of it.

(Sidenote: I just accidentally typed, "I didn't really think anything of us." Interesting.)

Anyhow, as we were looking over the menu, I glanced up to find that my ExSP was right, as I watched The Divorcee and a girl (who knows blogdad, BTW -- more six degrees of separation!) leaving the restaurant.

(I ALWAYS get this weird ESP feeling prior to running into this guy. My friends and I are sort of freaked out about it now, actually.)

But you know what? This was the first time that I have seen him since we broke up that I didn't feel a pang of sadness.

(Don't get me wrong. It was still weird to see him. Especially with a girl.)

Hmmm. Finally getting over an ex? Now that is sweet.