You give Val a bad name*

(* with apologies to JBJ and the rest of the Bon Jovi gang)

It seems I may have jumped the gun on suggesting that Val was a cokehead because he texted me at 7am last weekend.

Why? Because my friend texted me at (what I thought was) 1:13am last nite. So I wrote her back this morning and was like, "Why the eff were you texting me at 1am?"

She responded, "I didn't. I sent that at 8:29!"

Ooops. Which means the span between her sending the message and me getting the message was nearly five hours. Which also means that it's possible that Val actually sent that 7am message to me at more like 2am.

(And, really, who among us hasn't sent a drunk text when the bars were closing? Though I did specifically ask him after receiving that 7am text whether he had just sent it and I just got the proverbial "LOL!" response.)

So, I'm sorry for giving you a bad name, Val. Maybe you were being legit and just drunk texting me at the much more understandable time of 2am.

Or, maybe you're still just a cokehead. But I am willing to give you a second chance if you ever actually follow through with your suggestion of grabbing drinks.

In the meantime, I am continuing my Manhunt March activities and will have an update for all of you next week... including a date I have on Tuesday with a new potential... stay tuned!

P.S. Happy Spring!

Men are from Mars, women are from...

... total awesomeness! Ha ha ha!! OK, just kidding, guys. (Wink wink, ladies.)

But seriously. The comments on my last post (about Val and his weird 7am text) just go to prove that men and women really do have different brains.

The guys (for the most part) thought I was jumping to conclusions about Val and that I was reading too much into his text and its arrival time.

The women, on the other hand, were in total agreement with me that the guy is a slimeball and, quite possibly, a cokehead.

So, mystery solved. (Well, not really. I think it's safe to say that both sexes are still mysteries to each other.) But maybe mystery confirmed. Men and women really do interpret things totally differently.

Too bad for the guys that they're always on the side that interprets things wrong. ;)

Texts from last nite

If you read this blog with any regularity, you are well aware of my disdain for dating in the digital age. As in, boys using text messaging to court a lady.

(Don't get me wrong. I'm not expecting some handwritten love letter delivered by pony express. But maybe, just maybe, can you pick up the phone to call me a couple of times?!?)

Anyhow... I just discovered an awesome blog that I can totally relate to: Texts from Last Night. It's basically a running list of crazy texts readers sent or received the previous nite. Mosey on over and check it out. I promise you'll be entertained.

A recent example posted on the site (the numbers are the area codes of the sender/receiver):

(425): Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water(425): Legs for days

(425): Harpoon that

I bring this up because I think I may have a text to submit to this site now. After a few weekend texts from Val asking what I was doing on Saturday nite, he asked me to meet up for some beers sometime soon since I already had plans on Saturday. Fair enough. But then I received this text message from him:

What did u do tonite?

Well, at least he remembered the question mark this time. And the text in and of itself isn't bad at all. But here's the rub: the text came in at 7:04 am. Yes, he was still awake at 7 in the morning. Presumably from the nite before, since he used the word "tonite."

Now, I know it sounds like I'm jumping to conclusions here. But I did tell you that I thought he partied a little too much based on what I saw on his Facebook page right after he friended me last month. And today's Facebook status now reads: Val is going to lay low for a while. (Which, incidentally, was followed by several people's comments saying that would never happen.)

Do you think I'm jumping to conclusions? Or do you agree that this guy is just bad news?

I've heard of a 3-day wait period, but this is just crazy

We all have heard "the rule" for how long a guy waits to call (or these days, text) a girl after an initial conversation or first date. What, two or three days, right?

Wrong. Apparently, it's almost one month. After having brunch the day after Valentine's Day with Val (after meeting the nite before and him being adamant about getting together sooner than later), he pretty much disappeared (even though we had talked about possibly getting together the following weekend to grab a drink at The Velvet Tango Room).

Since that is par for the course in my dating life, I didn't think anything of it. And the more I "virtually" got to know him through his Facebook status updates (he had "friended" me while we were on our brunch date), the more I was questioning just what kind of guy Val is.

(What grown-ass man uses the word "dookies" in his status updates? Seriously?)

Then, on Wednesday nite, I receive this text from Val at almost 10:30pm:

R u doing happy hour tomorrow

My initial reactions to the text:

• You are very random, Val


• He must have sent this text to the wrong person


• Did we have plans that I don't remember making?


• Why didn't he use a question mark?

After that short-lived inner monologue, I texted back that I already had dinner plans with some friends, but assumed he must be going to happy hour so to have fun.

He replied with this: I was gonna meet up with u a chop house.

Again, I do not recall having plans to go to the Chop House with you, Val (though I do love their happy hour). I mean, if that is a request for a date, couldn't he at least have said, "I was hoping we could meet up at Chop House for a drink." Or something sort of like that?!?

Regardless, I had other plans last nite (a very fun girl date at Three Birds, where I ate too much bread and drank too much wine), so I didn't end up meeting up with him.

Guess that means I should expect to hear from him again in about another month or so. (Man, I am getting flashbacks of The Groundhog!)

Someone stole my idea...

Specifically, Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz stole my idea. Why? They just published a book called Flirtexting: How to Text Your Way to His Heart.

I really can't believe that Debra and Olivia have ever dated MORE guys that like texting than I have, so it stands to reason that this book should have been written by me. (Then again, I suppose that's what this blog is.)

Most recent texter? Val. We haven't verbally talked to since our date on Sunday (which was sort of OK with me because I was crazy busy all week anyhow), but he has texted and sent me Facebook messages throughout the week. Aaaahh. You know what I call that?

Digital Dating.

(Note to Debra and Olivia -- I am hereby copyrighting the Digital Dating phrase. Unless you want to pay me an assload to buy it as the title of your next book.)

Anyhow, apparently the premise of the Flirtexting book is this (taken from Amazon): You see, rather than feel disappointed that her guy isn't making an effort to talk F2F (face to face), the flirtexting aficionado works it.

So according to this book, I'm supposed to be glad a guy's not calling, right? No thanks.

But it would make my life a heck of a lot easier.

Thanks, Nance, for alerting me to this book!

Lonely hearts club = Sunday brunch date

Well, it turns out that having a GNO on Valentine's Day is actually pretty fun. The girls and I had a tasty dinner at Light Bistro (although our server had about as much personality as your keyboard) and followed that up with some cocktails at Bier Markt.

I thought it might be an interesting nite when we walked into Bier Markt and it appeared to be Sausage Fest '09. As in, I literally thought it might be gay nite there. But it wasn't. Yeah for us!

After we were at the bar for about an hour, I locked eyes with a guy across the bar, and he immediately came over to talk to us. Enter our newest blog fodder: Val. (See what I did there? For Valentin... oh, forget it.)

Anyhow, Val and I chatted for the rest of the nite. He was funny, cute, charming and confident. Score! (I even looked past the fact that he wasn't wearing a watch.) About halfway through our conversation, he asked if he could see me on Sunday because he was having such a good time.

Old AAB probably would have played coy so as to make it seem she wasn't so available. But *new* AAB said that sounded fun. (See? I told you I have turned over a new dating leaf this year.)

(Sidenote: I was apparently so caught up in my conversation with Val that I entirely missed the scene of my friend helping some woman who had puked on herself in the bar. Like, ALL OVER herself. On the couches in the front of the bar, not in the bathroom. Now that's what I call "love sick.")

But back to the story. Since I had lots going on later in the day on Sunday, Val and I met for brunch at Touch Supper Club. I walked in to find him sitting at the bar with a mimosa, and he looked just as cute in his Under Armour zip-up as he did in his button down and blazer the nite before.

We chatted, ate and shared embarrassing drinking stories for a couple of hours before I had to leave. I genuinely enjoyed our conversation, though I was a bit taken aback that both the bartender and the DJ knew Val by name. Party much? I actually called him out on it after a third person came in and knew him. He told me he just knows a lot of people. Hmmm...

(Another sidenote: Val took out his iPhone and Facebook friended me while we were at brunch, so now that I've been able to look at his profile... he does have quite a few bar pics in there. OK, a LOT of bar pics.)

Beyond the whole question of whether he parties too much, my only other hesitation with Val is that he just got divorced. (I swear, I have a knack for finding guys who are either in the middle of or just out of a divorce. Awesome timing, AAB.) She cheated and he kicked her out.

(Though this is now the third recently divorced guy who has given me this story... is that how they teach guys to get back into the dating scene in Divorce School?)

But I also learned that Val likes to cook, owns his own business (and works A LOT), likes to travel and has the same birthday as blogdad. (I found that last tidbit somewhat creepy.)

After a couple of hours, Val walked me to my car (I ALWAYS drive myself to a first date as an insurance policy/get-away plan), gave me a peck on the lips and referenced taking me out again this coming weekend.

So I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

But at least now I can say I had a date over Valentine's weekend. :)